Oh, hello, bonjour! I just got up this morning and… sacre’poutine! Solved the goddmaned financial crisis, don’t mind if I do! Or, at least part of it, anyway. Look, what if I were to offer you an instant EIGHT BILLION dollars a year on a product you could tax an estimable 6.2 BILLION more all the while shedding something like 5.3 BILLION in legal costs on a statewide level and 2.4 more YOU KNOW HOW MUCH on the federal? What would you do? Why wouldn’t you take it? You know what I’m talking about.
Listen, it won’t do much to quell the financial markets, but not only would the legalization of marijuana give a gigantic boost to our current cash flow problem, it sure as hell would go a long way to quell our national anxiety right now. In fact, I would go so far as to suggest mandatory bong hits for every man and woman on the stock exchange floor right now. E-Traders, ready your ‘enter’ keys, stocks set to Entenmanns!
Listen, I’m not hearing any better suggestions out there right now from these campaigns. McPain is out there staggering like a bull moose with a couple of 30 odd six rounds lodged in its trachea, and, frankly, and I don’t mean this in a bad way, but every second this market tips closer to the shit can of Depression, the better Obama’s chances are looking. I just hope he’s made some clandestine deal with the markets (ala Reagan and the Iranians) and this fucking mess improves after the election!
In the meantime, I am recommending some serious spliff time for every man, woman, and child in America. Our economy depends on it.
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