On the Trail in Indiana, March 24th

Sacre’ Poutine! The Indiana Senator, Evan Bayh, is now making suggestion that it is the Electoral Votes that should be the wand by which the Superdelegates anoint the party candidate (I do envision that woman; Pelosi, is her name, no?. Naaahncy Pelosi, yes; I can see her in glittered wings and sparkly wand now, and Al Gore is behind her, with smaller wings, of course, and they sing the Anointy song as they cast the magic demo-spell). The man, Bayh, campaigning with HRC in Indiana, told CNN’s Late Night, “So who carried the states with the most Electoral College votes is an important factor to consider because ultimately, that’s how we choose the president of the United States.” Nom Dieu, it reminds me of six-year-olds playing Trou du Cul; nobody knowing the rules, constantly proclaiming new boundaries and goals; throwing of the mud, hurling of the invective.

Tu n'sais pas?! Surely you know the card game? I believe you call it ‘President’, or ‘Asshole’, I think is right. And the Democrats, they are dumping cards into the other’s lap like the proverbial ‘hot potato’, no?

When the Obama kids hear race, it is a personal attack; when they bring it up, it is ‘transcending’ and ‘raises the discourse’. The Clinton brats, they won’t accept a final score, there are more cards up their sleeve; the popular vote (if you count Florida, if you count Michigan, you ought to pay attention to what the Puerto Ricans are going to say).

Nominally adult pundits like Norm Scheiber of the New Republic, believe this will all settle down by the time the dinner bell rings.

"Undecided superdelegates on Capitol Hill, along with party elders like Pelosi, Gore, and Harry Reid, "don't want to be seen as elites coming in and overturning the will of the people," says one senior House aide. A Senate staffer says his boss "thinks this give and take is natural, it will be helpful in the end." "That's a view held by a majority of these guys who have been through the cut and thrust of politics," he adds. Which means early June it is."

But he also reminds us of the last time a delegate-short candidate tried to poo poo his way into the nomination, in 1980, when Edward Kennedy fought all the way to the Garden of Madison Square and even trying to, from the floor of the Convention, split the delegate votes from each state along a gender line. I’m not an American, you know, but I think that was the year the monkey’s co-star won, no?

I’m not saying, you know, to stop it. I’m having a blast, what can I say? Alay! Seriously! Et vous prêt? I’m telling you, it’s only going to get better!